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7 Secrets to Being a Successful Communicator



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Article written by Aaress Lawless on Sep 14th 2009



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Image Credit: __Olga__

Communication is everything.

It may sound like a cliché, but it is a true one. Communication is what makes the world go round—and the lack of it is what makes your personal world come screeching to a halt.

I deal with the need for communication every day whether I am trying to understand the perspective of one of OTB’s writers while editing their work, or just trying to decide with a friend whether we want ice cream from Raos or soft drinks from Sonic. Communication takes part in the workplace, but also in the home with your family. It builds relationships, but the lack of it tears them apart.

Recently, I have been reading a book entitled Guerrilla P.R. 2.0. by Michael Levine, which highlights a few tips on how each of us can communicate better with those around us.

Seven Secrets to Being a Successful Communicator

A successful communicator is confident and unafraid to ask for what they want.
I do not know how many times my mother tried to drill into my head that the worse thing anyone could ever tell me when I asked for something was no. Dare to ask.

A successful communicator is appreciative of those who help them.
Communicating what you need is only half as important as communicating your thanks afterward. Nothing is more discouraging than to help an ungrateful person. Do not overlook those who help you reach your goals. Remember, you would not be there without them.

A successful communicator consistently nurtures relationships.
A relationship worth having is a relationship worth working on. Relationships are not like pet rocks. You cannot set them on a shelf, pour water on them once a blue moon when you remember, and expect them to grow. You have to invest in the life of the individual, spend time with them, and continually nurture that relationship.

A successful communicator is tenacious in going around obstacles.
Do you give up at the first sign of conflict or an obstacle? When the going gets rough, do you hit the road? I love this G. K. Chesterton quote, “An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is an adventure wrongly considered.”

A successful communicator is an excellent listener.
Do you actually listen to people? On the other hand, does your mouth start racing to reply while someone is still talking? Are you polite, or do you have a bad habit of cutting people off before they are finished? One thing I have been learning recently is to listen not only the words of a person, but also their body language, and ultimately, the heart behind the words. Not everyone is adept at verbal expression and if you ignore their non-verbal communication, you will never be able to understand fully what they are trying to tell you.

A successful communicator rebounds quickly and completely from rejection.
Do your wounds smart for a while after someone takes a jab at you or your project? Has your work become personal? Separate your identity from your work and when someone criticizes your pet project, you will be able to avoid making the criticism personal. Evaluate every rejection or criticism for potential lessons to be learned, and then move on. Do not fester or simmer. You are wasting valuable time and energy.

A successful communicator is friendly and approachable.
Who wants to hang around someone who is not friendly? Regardless of your personality, you can still be pleasant. Even the most seclusion-minded, introverted, Eeyore-like melancholic has a responsibility to be a friendly communicator. As Proverbs 18:24 says, “A man that hath friends must show himself friendly.” If you ever want to succeed at being a skilled communicator, you at least have to be approachable. If no one likes you, you had better believe that no one would want to deal with you.

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About the Heiress

I'm just your ordinary Mac (and Microsoft) fan, tennis journalist, PR consultant, gluten-free girl loving and learning about life with an extraordinary Savior.

My day job involves being the managing editor of On the Baseline Tennis News and a PR consultant with DuoParadigms.

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3 Comments

  1. Sep 17th, 2009

    Candace

    I gained a lot from this post! Thanks for sharing, Aaress!!

  2. Sep 18th, 2009

    Aaress

    Thanks, Candace!!!! By the way, when are you going to get a blog?!!?

  3. Sep 28th, 2009

    Candace

    I don’t know…I haven’t really thought about it actually! :) I figure Ben can keep everybody updated. ;)

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