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    6 Jun 2008

    True Love and Wrinkles

    Elderly Couple

    Have you ever sat down and just watched people? Airports are a great place—malls and amusement parks are even better!

    One evening I was waiting in a nursing home for my uncle, and I had a chance to sit down and observe some of the residents and their interactions with each other, but more important their interactions with visitors.

    I saw some people who looked surprised to see their visitors. I saw what appeared to be a father and son conversing together outside as the son rocked his father in his wheelchair.

    I saw residents looking longingly at the visitors as if to say Are you here to see me? But the sight that left the biggest impression on my mind was a moving scene between a husband and wife.

    The gentleman was elderly, but appeared to be dealing with age well–he even had a cell phone clipped to his hip.

    Unfortunately, his wife was a completely different story.

    She looked as if she had Alzheimer’s, but was still being visited faithfully by her husband. As he prepared to leave for the evening, he leaned over, kissed her and said in the most loving tone, “I’ll be back tomorrow for lunch.”

    This man, despite his wife’s mental and physical limitations, still loved her from every fiber of his being and wanted to take the time to visit and have lunch with her.

    When he said his marriage vows, possibly decades ago, he meant them from the bottom of his heart. I did a search for traditional wedding vows online, and these words from The Wedding Network personify what I observed that day.

    “I, give you this ring, wear it with love and joy. I choose you to be my wife: to have and to hold, from this day forward. For better, for worse, for richer for poorer; in sickness and in health; to have and to cherish, as long as we both shall live. And hereto, I pledge you my faithfulness to show to you the same kind of love as Christ showed the Church when He died for her, and to love you as a part of myself because in His sight we shall be one.”

    You know, much of what we see today in marriages is based on physical attraction.

    God designed beauty, and it is a gift from Him. I’m writing specifically to women because much of what we desire in a mate is someone who finds us physically attractive.

    But girls, we want husbands who will still love us after 50 years of marriage.

    The wife I observed today was not what you or I would call “drop dead gorgeous,” yet for her husband, she was the only one he was placing his attention on.

    I desire to make myself attractive in the eyes of my future mate, if God has chosen marriage in my future, but most importantly, I want to seek for the beauty of my soul.

    Aging is a fact of life; no amount of Botox, Oil of Olay, or plastic surgery can change that.

    Former Miss America’s still get gray hair. But the soul of a Christian never ages.

    You want a marriage that is based upon the spiritual connection between you and your mate, never the physical attraction.

    Obviously, you want to marry an attractive mate– nothing wrong with that. But when you are old and gray, do you want your husband who still may appear in the prime of his life, seeking a physically attractive partner?

    This was certainly not what I saw this evening.

    I saw an example of genuine love that lasted through the decades.

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    Aaress Lawless

    I'm just your ordinary Mac (and Microsoft) fan, history buff, PR consultant, bookworm, gluten-free, dairy-free girl loving and learning about life with an extraordinary Savior.

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